How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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