what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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