I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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