i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
