Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
