It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Randomize
