I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
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