If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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