Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Randomize