i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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