Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I have fence marks all over my body
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
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