i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
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