I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
