life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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