that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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