whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
