What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize
