Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
