She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
