You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize