Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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