fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
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