Its about making memories worth repressing
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Randomize
