how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Randomize
