That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Ketchup is God's man juice
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
