no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
This baby is an asshole
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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