Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
At least life still wants to fuck me.
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