i just snorted my name. best moment ever
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
