She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
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