escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
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