You're my little dorito
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Randomize
