his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
It's shark week go big or go home
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
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