Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
