the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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