i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Randomize
