Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Do you remember whose house we're in?
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
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