So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
