I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
