so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
