she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
