she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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