I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
