Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
