Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
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