people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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