You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Randomize
