Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
