Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
