idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize