do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
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