This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
